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Writer's pictureRavenna Donohue

The Tale of 2 Tables by Glen Bankson

Well, what’s a very cool piece of furniture that you can not only sit on, AND eat on, but also plan how to make a double-decker 2-story bunktable table? Well, if you said a chair, you my friend, are quite mistaken. In fact, if you said anything but a table, you are also wrong, but if you also said, “anything but a table,” you couldn’t be more wrong. But you are a smart individual, and you did not say that. And though I cannot tell that from your eyes, but I can tell that by your decision to check out the SUPER COOL NEW BLOGS FROM NATHAN HALE THEATRE. THEY ARE COMING OUT AND THEY ARE SUPER COOL AND THEY ARE FROM NATHAN HALE THEATRE.


Anyways, today, Saturday, on October 15, 2022, I got to plan how to make a double-decker 2-story bunktable table on a table with my bestest bestie and other besties. Throughout the whole day, we were making 2 double-decker 2-story bunktable tables AND I was very very safe the whole time (hahaha- yeah right)- In fact, I don’t even remember melting, decapitating, or dropping any pianos from significant heights onto anyone the ENTIRE time I was at the work party, I don’t think anyone else did either. But the best part is when I got to use the circular saw and also the jigsaw to NOT dismember people. And after I was done using the saws on things that were not people, I went to go count my fingers. And surprise surprise! All 10 of the original ones I was born with were not just there, but they were also all in one piece and the same length I remembered them being last time I saw them, give or take a few inches. But they were close enough to their previous length for me to say they were the same length as before, and I am incredibly pleased by this. I also had some of my friends also count them all to help me make sure that I hadn’t lost a finger and just counted poorly. According to one of them, it sounds like I was so safe, that I didn’t just not lose a finger, or 10, but I actually (allegedly) GREW A FINGER. LIKE THEY COUNTED 11! How much more safe can you get? Now, when I compare my hand to old pictures of my hand, the amount of fingers still look like the same, so it might’ve been temporary, or they might have been bad at counting, or I am really, really bad at counting- And maybe that is the case, so I might have to spend some time refreshing myself on how to count, since they don’t teach that stuff at this level of education, y’know?.


But something I did learn, among other things (like, how to safely use a circular saw, and how to safely use a jigsaw (which is called a jigsaw for a reason, like it really hits that jig), and that using oneself as a sawhorse is not a prime demonstration of workspace safety), is that my dear friend Benjamin Richard Mayes, has my middle name, and also that my full name is Glen Benjamin Richard Mayes Bankson. So that’s one of the great things about these work parties, not only do you get to see tables, and people, and people and tables, and people and table tables, but you also get to learn so much about yourself.

All in all, it was a swell day, I got to spend quality time with quality people while breathing quality air (20% whatever air normally is, and equal parts that ‘bad’ stuff in the air and sawdust), while having a dandy day of building table tables. I couldn’t be more satisfied with how things turned out. I even got to meet a cool rabbit and take a couple of pictures with them on my walk home and then also stopped by the house of perhaps the coolest person ever.



Now that you’ve taken the time to read this… thing, you should also do some other things. Like go to the remaining Saturday work parties at Nathan Hale (remaining dates are on 10/22, 10/29, and 10/35- I mean 11/5). But you should also go to recorder club once I get it started if you have any respect for good music and good instruments. It shall be in Ms. Sibicky’s room on Mondays during lunch. But most of all, you should see at least one of the performances of ‘The Imaginary Invalid’ at Nathan Hale High School, which shall be running some time in November. I would definitely go see it all 4 times it ran if I were you. But I am not you, and perhaps your appetite for quality theatre isn’t as large as mine, so maybe one will do… In any event, it shall be a great show for us to show you. And I am certain you will enjoy it all 4 times I am there.


If you read all of this, I applaud you. I had a very good time writing it, but I hope you also had a good time reading it, and I hope you will also have a good time watching ‘The Imaginary Invalid’ at Nathan Hale High School. I also hope you have a good day. In fact, I hope you have all those things even if you DIDN’T read the whole thing, even if you didn’t just skip to the end to this point. Have a very, very good day, and night, and sleep, and awakening, and just have a good. You deserve it.

Oh, also the rabbit would be very happy if you were to attend a future work party, or three. Two would also be cool. But three would be best. But they need you to watch at least one of Nathan Hale’s performances of ‘The Imaginary Invalid.’


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