Hehe blog post time! I’m not entirely sure on what to write about so consider this a wee journal entry, or perhaps a little stroll through part of my brain. Senior year has developed a new flavor as the world continues to happen to me. Like a road that I can run or walk down, and no matter what, I can’t see the next step ahead of me until my foot is on it, and by then it’s already left the ground and I’m on to the next blind step in my stride. It’s thrilling to “run in the dark” like this but it can also feel uncertain and frustrating to not know where I'm going but trusting that if I can take enough steps in the right direction I will get to where I want to be.
A new term has been coined recently, among my friends and I (mostly Nina, shoutout to Nina McKinstry). A Henry moment. Even I, being the one who frequently has these moments, am not entirely sure how to capture a “Henry moment”. I’m also not sure that’s the best name for them as I will very soon get sick of hearing my name so many times. A new name is in order!! But first I should really try to capture what these moments feel like. My best description of these moments, would be to say that they feel like a mild existential crisis, or several if you’re really really having a “Henry moment”. There is hope though! These moments aren’t all bad! (Either they aren’t all bad or I am slowly losing my sanity hehe...) Often these moments are eye opening, and I emerge exceptionally grateful for myself and the world around me.
Recently in rehearsal I sat out from the ensemble and watched them perform a number called “Dancing”. Normally I would be in this number, however with the current orders from my doctor, I am not to be dancing on my leg that has a stress fracture. I sat and watched. My castmates swiftly captivated me as my mind flew along with the choreography, doing my best to follow along in my head. 1 2 3! 1 2 3! In soars the rest of the ensemble, and... wow. I sank further into the floor I was sitting on and couldn’t look away from the stage as the number went on. Soon my own choreography in my head didn’t matter, only the story they were telling did. I could feel my chest fill with pride at watching my castmates thrive onstage. These people who I’ve put in long hours of rehearsal with, these people with laughs and smiles that are the best kind of infectious and that light up the room, look at them go! I couldn’t stop myself from smiling a big cheesy grin. I found myself smiling with my mouth open, which I’m sure was a sight to see as I came to the realization that I was deep within one of my favorite “Henry moments” to date.